To say goodbye
by Phoenics
Summary: To accept is worse than to lose.you can fight anything but a goodbye means accepting a loss and with that moving on.And that is something no one can fight.


Disclaimer:I own everything in the world. I own the sun and all the other thingys, I own you. Yeah…I own inuyasha too..ahaaaaa..that's why I am writing a FANfiction.Anyway since I own the sun..and this white blouse that has my arms kinda incomfortably wraped and I am staring at all this white walls I'll give up inuyasha to the great artist who invented him,Rumiko Takahashi.I have the whole world:P

To say goodbye

"all stories, if continued far enough, end in death, and he is no true-story teller who would keep that from you. "  
Ernest Hemingway

He couldn't feel anymore. It was just impossible. How can you feel so much pain that you get to a point where you're just numb, you eat , sleep and do everything and yet you don't know why. What's the point when life is just about losing? When you're born to lose.

Those were going through Inuyasha's head while he looked toward the sky. The sunset always reminded him of Kikyo. Now he looked at it and saw 50 years of his life dissapearing along with the last shades of reddish-pink. It hurt, but he could't place this hurt anymore. It was drenching every last bit of hope that he saved. But it wasn't the loss of her that hurt the most and he felt guilty for not saving her, for not knowing what hurt and for letting himself not feel the most pain from her death. She had smiled and he cried..he cried for everything they didn't have and for everything that her smile promised knowing that this time she could never come back.

She could never see Naraku defeated now. She deserved it the most though..

"I swear..when I kill him the last thing he will see will be your arow thrust in him..right where you struck me.."

What will happen now? He didn't want to know, because he realized that they were never meant to be, and without what happened none of the present would have existed. Inuyasha didn't want to think of Kagome now..he couldn't and it seemed useless.the present seemed empty and he felt guilty for that too. It looked as if anything that happened he would end up feeling guilty.

But ..the only certain thing in life is that we all die..every living thing has its ending..

"Inuyasha..we're eating..if you want ..uhhmm..please come.."

Kagome's voice..it was full of the pain he couldn't say and he wanted to show her it wasn't her fault and he didn't want to be like this now. If everything would just stop…

Inuyasha was startled when cherry blossoms fell on him(I need the clichee for something..bare with me:) .

"Spring blossoms..why is that I always feel sad when I'm in front of one?"he didn't notice Kagome had stayed next to him.

"Because in front of one no matter how young you are you'll always feel old.."Kagome said and took his hand without him ever noticing. "I don't want to be here if you don't want and please don't think I'm trying to take her place or that I want the attention..I just..want you to know you're not alone,I.."

Inuyasha looked at her,at her tears and at their hands..he felt old, too old, he had survived through too much and too many deaths.and he had said too many goodbyes.Kagome couldn't understand, she couldn't know what Kikyo had meant but she cried what he couldn't anymore..Kikyo's smile promised his future and Kagome's tears closed his past.And then he smiled squeezing her hand a little.He was destroyed on the inside but Kikyo wouldn't want him like this,her last moments were where she returned to the girl he had always known..no more revenge or pain..just her.But that was all he could do, nothing will change what happened and he had to say goodbye again, the first time he did it when she died but then he said goodbye to them, now he had to do it to her..for her..

"Thank you ."Kagome looked at him with wide eyes."you know,these flowers remind me of her.." Then he took one and threw it in the horizon.

"Goodbye..Kikyo.."

This isn't very good..i know but it's my first. I think kikyo is a big part of Inuyasha and I tried to capture and that her death means much more to the story then just his ex-love dieing.that but I know I couldn't.I tried to ignore anything squishy because it had absolutely no sense in my story.It isn't meant to be a romance here but more of a friendship...please review,I don't want it for credits,I really need to know if I should stop writing or not.


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